Here I am, blogging again
after previous updates (which was ages ago I know)..
Just finished my 1-week
holiday and I am back to Sandakan. It was a simple yet awesome holiday for me. As time goes, I learned to appreciate those little
things which seem unimportant but truly warm me. Hanging out with friends which
I have known since primary school (you’re right, since PRIMARY school), meeting
up with other uni’s close friends, movie-dating with whole family, shopping spree,
randomly changing the TV channels as long as I like (Yes I LOVE to do this) and
the list goes down….all these moments count, these are the times which I
treasure a lot. (Ok I am babbling now)
Trying to recall the days
when I attached to clinical. From early May to end of June, I have attached to total
of 4 wards. I know that there are differences between hospitals as my friends
told me their clinical attachment lasted for 6 weeks. Anyway, I started my
clinical in Male Medical Ward followed by Female Medical Ward, Paediatric, and
ICU. Honestly I was stressed up during that period, but who doesn’t stress up?
So I should not complain and try my best instead.
This was the period where I
found myself with serious lack-of competency. Knowledge wise I felt inferior
but I learned as much as I could to perform my work. I get to expose to various types of clinical
diseases and their managements. One could not always manage two patients of
same diagnosis with same approaches. I learned to think wider, or what we call
it as treating the patient holistically. I tend to make judgments without
taking into ALL considerations. For example, when need to be cautioned on
patient’s renal dosage adjustment, I need to consider on the disease itself as
well as drug-drug interactions. Of course there are much more factors which we
need to be concerned. Most of the times, it was ward pharmacists who noticed “something
wrong” and made interventions with doctors.
Clinical is challenging, but
interesting at the same time. The feeling of able to help patients who are suffering
made the job worthy. Funny things or “special” patients do exist but it all
depends on how I cope with and perhaps my attitude towards all these unexpected
issues. Sometimes I do get tired, with the constant pressure which I put myself
on; I did wish to end clinical attachment soon.
I think part of the reason which I hoped to
end my clinical soon towards the end of my attachment was because of the last
ward I have attached toàICU. It wasn’t because of the work load or the people
I have worked with there. Indeed I found other health care professionals to be
very kind to me. It was because I found
myself to be “emotionally-unstable” when working there. I have seen intubated
patients whom self-extubated and forced to be re-intubated, patient who was
being tied up because of restlessness and aggressive behaviours, and patients
with SVT or asystole who could not make it. All these made me to feel super
helpless as a pharmacist. The most sensitive trigger factor for my fluctuating emotions
was family members who visited the patients. I just couldn’t bear with them
calling the patient’s names when patient was unconscious or sedated. The worst
was the tears from family members, with the hopeless feeling that their loved
one will be gone anytime. =(. Anyhow, attachment in ICU has taught me how
multidisciplinary teams cooperate like how anaesthetic team discuss the management
plan with Medical team. There is still so much more to learn!
I admire all the ward pharmacists in hospitals
(any hospitals), for their working spirits in performing daily tasks and their
endurances. I think I would find clinical more interesting if there is no
clerking-cases requirement. XD.
Changing my topic away from
my clinical attachment, I randomly bought a book written by Rhonda Byrne. Title
with The MAGIC. I did not read The Secret nor The
Power written by her. Hopefully I will gain something from this book. Saw a quote from the book, would like to end
my post with it
“Gratitude is riches.
Complaint is poverty”. I am in the progress of learning to complain less.
Cheers
